Love Is In the Air, Every Time You Come Around

Post author By Dre
Post date July 27, 2008
13 Comments on Love Is In the Air, Every Time You Come Around

I’m the mom of two girls. They’ll never have a brother to tell them the ways of the world, to protect them from jerks who only want one thing. And when they’re teenagers, who are they really going to listen to: their old fart mom and dad, or some smoove-talking guy with an itch in his pants?

But I’ve got a plan, people. Here on the ranch, there’s always a bit of Love In The Air, shall we say, among the animals. Today, Jeremy put the bull in with some of the cows, and I got the girls all lined up to watch the herd.

Of course I didn’t narrate, because I want them to draw their own conclusions. But I’ll go ahead and narrate here, because it’s more fun that way.

He’ll pay lots of attention to you, honey. Call you beautiful (and you are!).

He’ll follow you around, swearing he’s in love.

You’ll feel like you’ve got a lot in common.

You’ll probably grab a bite to eat. If he’s a gentleman, he’ll let you pick the spot.

He’ll wait patiently for you while you shop, or make a phone call. On a side note, you might not want to show so much cleavage so early on in your relationship. No, no, I’m not criticizing! Just a suggestion.

If you accidentally poop on him, (or possibly throw up, depending on the circumstances), he’ll be very forgiving. Maybe even act like it never happened, and discretely wipe it off when you’re not looking.

He’ll even hang out with your friends and act interested in what they have to say.

But at the end of the day, when all is said and done, he really only wants one thing.

Oh, and girls? Babies are cute, but they change your life (and your cup size) forever.

13 replies on “Love Is In the Air, Every Time You Come Around”

that was hysterical. i can just picture the ruckus that my girls would make if they saw that happening. of course they are 8 and 15 and we’ve had the talk so i’m sure they would be grossed out but not able to look away.

That was too funny! What a way to learn about the birds and the bees – oops, I mean the cows and the bulls!

That was too funny. I fear the day I have to have that talk with my girls. Thanks for the tips!

That is great! I love your dialog!

One day, we were driving down the highway and saw some cows ‘dating’ and soon after I got all romantic with the hubby. He now thinks that cow sex turns me on and watches carefully when we pass meadows for cows fornicating so he can point them out to me.