Mayday, MAYDAY!

I don’t fit in my pants.  Or my shirts.  Or my dresses.  Even my under.wear is starting to get uncomfortable.

The complete, honest truth?  I’ve been wearing a lot of my old maternity clothes.  And since my “baby” is about to turn three, there is a whole lot wrong with that.

In the past 9 months, I’ve gained a little over 20 pounds.  My body fat has gone up by 13%.

I’d like to blame it all on the Lexapro, which is known to cause “moderate weight gain” but all those grilled cheese sandwiches, all that pad thai, all those burritos and oh my goodness the wine, cheese and chocolate, plus the fact that I’ve rarely exercised – those factors kind of blow that theory out of the water.  Or at least give it a whole lot less credibility.

Last weekend, I ran from the car to the house to grab a couple of juice boxes for the kids, and something happened.  My belly flab went rogue.  I don’t even know how to describe how that felt, except to say that it was a wake up call.

I’ve watched the numbers on the scale creep upward.  I’ve noticed my clothes don’t fit as well. 

But then I think, it’s only a few pounds, right?  My husband is actually loving the fact that I have an ass to grab.  And also?  Who really complains about being a size FIVE, honestly, there is nothing at all wrong with that.  There are plenty of women out there who would gladly give up a few toes to be that size.

Except.  I may be well within the “normal” weight range for my height, but I don’t feel good.  I don’t feel healthy.  I’m exhausted and cranky all the time, and I’m not nourishing my body. 

So, I’ve decided that May is going to be my month to get back on track.  Not to necessarily “lose weight” but to get healthy.

I’m not going to follow any kind of crazy diet or exercise regimen – I’ve tried all kinds of things over the past 9 months that only seem to exasperate the problem, and in truth, make me feel like shit.

I’m setting some very general goals:

*  My diet will consist mainly of fruits, vegetables and lean proteins with a few whole grains thrown in for good measure.

*  I will exercise in some way for a minimum of 15 minutes every day.

*  I will drink at least 64 ounces of water every day.

*  I will take a photo of myself from the front and the side at least once a week.

*  I will weigh myself no more than once a week – no obsessive scale-watching.

*  I will drink wine only one night a week, if at all.

My hope is to lose at least 3% of my body fat in the month of May.  A lofty goal, but attainable.  I plan to update my progress here once a week, just to hold myself accountable.  I just ended two sentences in a row with -able.  Now go eat a vegetable.  Whee!  This is fun.  I’m really just trying to postpone the inevitable.

The before photos.  Ready?  I am totally cheating by posting them in black and white.  Everything looks better in black and white!  Right?  Here I am in my too-small pants.

Bleah. 

Now I’m off to kick some ass, and it’s not even MAY yet!