I want to shout from the rooftops that we may have found a CURE for Blythe’s food allergies.
But I’m afraid to, because what if it doesn’t work? What if it’s just some quack peddling pipe dreams?
But what if it isn’t a hoax? What if it works and my girl can live a normal life? What if we can take her somewhere and not worry that she’ll be exposed to something that will make her miserable for days, or worse, force us to use her EpiPen?
What if, as the doctor promises, she’ll be able to start eating normal foods as soon as 24 hours after each treatment?
I close my eyes and picture what it will be like to watch her face the first time she tries
ice cream!
cake!
french fries!
bread!
scrambled eggs!
chips!
candy!
Or even the simple things, like
noodles with SAUCE!
REAL pizza instead of the stuff I make at home with rice crust and faux cheese
REAL pancakes, not the gluten free stuff that is flat and gooey
Peanut butter!
A peanut butter and jelly sandwich!
GRILLED CHEESE!
corn on the cob!
or the first time we take her to a birthday party and let her
eat what the other kids are eating!
keep what she finds out of the pinata!
choose something off the buffet!
Oh my goodness, just thinking about it is overwhelming.
Yesterday, I attended a class with a local doctor who recently began using a machine called the BAX3000, made by BioAllergenix. It’s a newfangled homeopathic treatment that uses frequencies delivered by laser to retrain the nervous system to stop attacking harmless substances.
It sounds hokey. It sounds too good to be true. It sounds…. worth a try.
As one of the doctor’s first patients, I promised to give our testimonial and spread the good word if this treatment works. In exchange, the doctor is giving us a two-for-one special so that I’ll be treated right along with Blythe. I’m relieved to be receiving treatment as well, so that I will know first hand how it feels, whether my allergy symptoms are abated, and more importantly, whether it’s safe to expose Blythe.
We’ll be undergoing 30 treatments over the next 6 weeks, and I will document them here.
I’m afraid to get my hopes up…. but honestly? Hope feels really freaking good.
Category: Health and Nutrition
Categories
Answers
I’ve been feeling sluggish lately. And by “lately” I mean for the past two years.
What? “Lately” is a relative term.
So I went to my doctor last week and poured my heart out. It took a lot of courage for me to do that – to ask for help. The fact that I not only called to make the appointment but actually showed up for it is testament to the fact that I have been feeling especially horrid for the past few weeks.
After calming me down, my doctor took a brief medical history, including asking for details about Blythe’s birth, which seemed, in my mind, to be the catalyst for my downward spiral.
It didn’t take long for him to make an educated guess on my problem: a fairly rare condition called Sheehan’s Syndrome.
All the pieces fit, the biggest one being that I hemorrhaged after giving birth. I continued to bleed internally for two weeks, until I gave birth to the softball sized clot keeping all that inside my uterus, (a fun mental picture, no?) and then hemorrhaged again in the operating room, losing an entire liter of blood in one go. So, blood loss after pregnancy? That’s a big fat CHECK.*
All the rest of it – the moodiness, the lethargy, the difficulty breast feeding, the feeling cold all the damn time, the depression, the anxiety, the “female issues”, the low metabolism, it all fits, too.
They’ve drawn my blood to test the levels of my hormones to see how badly my pituitary gland was damaged by lack of oxygen during the blood loss. From there, I’ll start on hormone replacements and see if we can put Humpty Dumpty back together again.
In the meantime, I’ve been taking an anti-anxiety/anti-depressant (Lexapro, 10mg) for a week now. While the side effects were a bit daunting to begin with, I think I’m starting to adjust, and beginning to see more and more of my old self – my real self – shining through. It’s so nice to see her. I was beginning to think she was lost forever.
The amount of relief I felt when my doctor told me there was most likely a physiological reason for the way I’ve been feeling far outweighed the bad news that I’d have to be on hormone replacements, possibly for the rest of my life. Here I was, feeling guilty for my depression for two full years, and there was a perfectly logical explanation for it all.
But, as the days have passed, I’ve begun to wonder how I’ll feel if my blood tests come back ‘normal’. Will I still feel as good as I’ve begun to feel, or will the guilt start creeping back in?
For two years, I’ve been angry at myself for feeling resentful of the chaos that is my life, all the while knowing I’m grateful for everything I have. I don’t want to feel that way anymore. I want to forgive myself for feeling like life is just effing hard sometimes, regardless of whether my pituitary gland is broken or whole.
So, I wait. Another week, and I’ll know for sure. I hope I won’t care about the answer.
* Go here and here if you’d like to read more about that crazy experience.
I was stopped at a red light the other day, when a donut shop on the corner caught my attention. It’s been there for a decade or so, but I still feel surprised (and slightly horrified) whenever I notice they are still in business.
Fresh Donuts. Yes, I bet those donuts are fresh, but you’ll never catch me eating them.
What have donuts ever done to me, you ask? Not a thing.
But once, long ago, that building housed a Taco Bell. A Taco Bell that became known by another, less appetizing name.
Sadly, although the donut place does seem to stay in business, no one I know calls it “the donut shop on such and such corner”. It is, and will always be, “the place where Shit in the Beans Taco Bell used to be“.
It was called Shit in the Beans Taco Bell for a reason. People ate human feces mixed in with their beans. Dozens of people. If I had been one of them, I’d still be brushing my teeth, and possibly gargling acid. And then I’d still feel dirty.
It’s not an urban myth, but a true incident that made our local paper, resulted in someone being fired and given jail time, and the eventual closure of said Taco Bell. Because no one but ignorant out-of-towners ever set foot in that building again.
Sure, they probably washed the place out. The Health and Safety Inspector had to have been all over that place. But would you walk in there and order a bean burrito, all the while thinking of Shit in the Beans?
Exactly. I won’t even order a donut.
Categories
Becoming a Shredhead
I’m hopping on the 30 Day Shred with trainer Jillian Michaels bandwagon. I need to get back into shape after treating my body liking a dumping ground for the past 6 (ok 9) (or more) months.
To help keep me motivated, I’m joining the Shredheads, fearlessly led by Kristen of Motherhood Uncensored. My first task is to post an introduction, so here we go, with my photos and stats!
Here’s me, 6 weeks and 12 weeks pregnant with Blythe, respectively. I don’t expect to look quite like that first picture any time soon, but it sure would be nice if I didn’t look bigger than I did when I was 3 months pregnant with my second child.
6 weeks 
12 weeks
Today
I’ve done two days of the 30 Day Shred so far, but, um, not in a row. At ALL. I was so sore after my first attempt on Monday it took until Thursday before I could even THINK about doing another push up. And even then I had to switch to the sissy modified method.
Instead of tracking my weight, I’m going to work on lowering my body fat. I’m within my normal weight range, but my body fat is a whopping 8% higher than it was this time last year. Holy Effing Bean Burrito, people.
Body fat: 25%
Goal: Stop treating my body like a garbage dump
Diet Plan: Drink more water, make healthier food choices, eat fewer processed foods, carry healthy snacks with me in the car so I’m less tempted by other things
Personal Rules: Drink a glass of water before eating, eat away from home no more than once a week
Shred Plan: I’d like to shoot for 5 days per week. 10 days of each level, if I can handle it!