I don’t know if I’ve ever mentioned it before, but I’m a great wife. So when it comes time for Jeremy to have a birthday, I like to give him what he wants. Keep your minds out of the gutter, people – what he likes is stuff like ice cream and cake. I’m normally pretty handy in the kitchen, but ever since this whole no-egg, no-corn thing, I’m a rookie chef all over again. Fortunately, there’s this great thing called the innernets, or something, that allows me to search for (and find!) recipes for just about everything. 1 1/2 cups whole wheat graham flour (any old flour will do for you non-allergics) Well, wait. Maybe not yet. When the wacky cake recipe tells you to wait until the cake is cool before removing it from the pan, they don’t just mean not hot. And also? You’ll need some frosting on your cake, but if you’re looking to make a no-egg, no-corn frosting, you’d better do some more searching. If one of your favorite bloggers happens to post a recipe for frosting that contains no egg or corn mere days before you need one, maybe God is smiling down on you, and angels are singing hallelujah. Or you could just be lucky, but whatever. Only, people? When she says beat until stiff, you and your husband can go ahead and snicker all you want. But don’t think that pretty stiff is good enough, just because your arm is tired. Go back to elementary school where you learned how to follow directions, because otherwise this is what your cake will look like: You’ll offer up your tasty confections when your husband arrives home from work. You and your kids will sing him “Happy Birthday” and maybe give him a foot rub (not to say any of this actually happened). Once again, you’ll be thought of as a great wife. If you happen to have a great husband, he’ll go ahead and eat your falling apart, drippy wacky cake without complaint, anyway.
Case in point: I found a recipe for Wacky Cake which originates from the South during the Depression Era. Ergo, it has no eggs because all the chickens dried up back then.
To make a Wacky Cake you combine all of the dry ingredients in a bowl:
1 cup organic sugar
3 tbsp unsweetened cocoa
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp granular sea salt
Once these are nice and stirred up, you make three wells (2 small, 1 large) for your wet ingredients, which are 1 tsp vanilla, 1 tsp vinegar, 5 tbsp vegetable oil:
Does anyone else see a creepy face in the bowl? Maybe that’s why it’s called Wacky Cake.
Next you pour a cup of cold water over the top of the creepy face, and stir until moistened. Pour into a small cake pan, bake at 350 for 25-30 minutes, and voilĂ . You’re a great wife, just like me.
When your husband’s birthday cake looks like that, you may not earn your great wife rating from your efforts in the kitchen, alone. You’ll end up like me, making another batch of Wacky Cake batter, and busting out the mixer again and getting a sore arm again, until the mixture truly is stiff. All for a dozen or so cupcakes, which your daughter will thoroughly enjoy frosting in her own unique style.
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2 replies on “Wacky Cake : A Cautionary Tale”
Bossy is a Great Wife just like this. Would you believe ‘mediocre’?
Gooey is goodie. Yum.