Suddenly Alison’s manners are nonexistent. Her attitude rivals that of a pre-teen (or are they calling them “tweens” now?) and she listens about as well as a man watching the Super Bowl. I hate that I have to speak sternly in order for her to respond to me. Especially because I don’t want to be that kind of parent. I know it works for plenty of people, but I have the guilt so it doesn’t work for me.
Over the weekend I took a moment to put myself in her shoes and come up with a solution that would motivate both of us. So far, it seems to be working quite well! She gets to reward me with smiley faces and punish me with frowney faces, just like I do for her. Each week she works on a particular behavior that needs attention, but she can get faces for pretty much anything. For every 6 smiley’s in a row, she gets a reward which we’ve chosen beforehand. This week, we are both working on speaking nicely and listening. She is having such a blast rewarding me and punishing me – and people, our charts are looking pretty good.
Category: Kids
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Apples & Oranges and Peas & Carrots
Alison’s cousin is about six months older than her. Which means people have been comparing them since, oh, about the moment she was born. Possibly even sooner, as she poked her foot around in my belly. I recognized fairly early on that comparing them was like comparing apples to oranges: one you can bite right into, the other needs some careful peeling. One is rough, the other smooth. Both fruits have great characteristics but you can’t really say one is better tasting, because an apple is an APPLE, and an orange is an ORANGE. Of course, if you are the mother of an orange or an apple, you may have a preference.
So for the past 4 1/2 years, Alison’s cousin has come over to play and each time there are tears, frustration, temper tantrums. Toy snatching, pouting, hugs and kisses. Time-outs, noses to corners, missed naps and promises to be best friends forever. A tumultuous relationship, to say the least. Last weekend Alison’s cousin came over and for the first time, EVER, there were no tears. They played together for HOURS, people. HOURS. I still can’t get over it. I even invited Alison’s cousin back “soon”. Which was yesterday, and maybe I had my hopes up way too high. Because not 5 minutes into the visit, Alison got run over by the JEEP. On PURPOSE. Which led to lots of tears, on both sides. Apples and Oranges, crying over the same event but for different reasons. Fortunately, a little Hello Kitty will solve just about any problem and they were back to playing in about half an hour. My greatest hope is that they’ll be more tolerant of each other’s differences as time goes on. My greatest fear is that my own two will end up polar opposites. Because apples and oranges living in the same household? THAT would send me to the loony bin for sure.
I call this one: “Peaceful Cooperation”
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I… HOP
My dad has a 1953 Studebaker so he is all about showing it off. Our local IHOP hosts classic car shows on Saturday nights from Spring through Fall (weather permitting) and this weekend was the first of the year. It was quite a shin-dig, with bounce houses and music and free sno-cones and a Cookie-Lee jewelry booth, so my parents took Alison there on a “date”. She enjoyed a grape sno-cone before dinner, a cherry sno-cone after, and made several new friends inside the bounce house. She also stalked “Charlie” the chocolate chip pancake, who, for the record, does NOT pee outside, even though he’s a boy.
Blythe and I met them for dinner (is it still called dinner if you eat breakfast? Alison doesn’t think so) but didn’t stick around for the festivities. What I want to know is how they can bring all the grown folks their food and make a small child wait, plate-less, for an extra 15 minutes. And seriously, pancakes? Should be the easiest, quickest thing to make. I mean, for The International House of Pancakes, anyway. I’m just sayin’. While Alison WAITED for her food, she managed to poke a hole in the styrofoam cup they brought her milk in. The hole was about a half inch from the bottom, and so it spilled all over the table, which led right to her LAP. She wanted me to drive home and get her some dry pants, but I was not about to do that 40 minute round-trip drive. I know, I’m the worst mom ever – but wait, it gets worse. She was sitting across the table from me, so I didn’t see the damage until she came over to give me a hug good-bye. I tried my very, very best not to laugh at my poor girl, but she looked just like she had peed her pants. A LOT. So yes, people, I laughed and made her wear those pants for the rest of the night. NOW you can call me the worst mother ever.
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Hannah – WHO?
‘Round here, Monday is “Ma’maw Day” and Wednesday is “Mommy Day” for Alison. We swap kids on those days so that we both have some alone time with each of the girls.
I love Mommy Wednesdays, because it gives Alison and I some time to really talk and have fun with no other distractions. Typically we go to lunch after school, run errands, go visit friends and find something fun to do. Here are some of the best quotes from today:
In response to the question, “Do you want to get your hair cut after lunch?”
“No, I want to grow it to here (gesturing). I want it long like Hannah Montana”
After losing her pink balloon from Red Robin (always with the Red Robin!):
“Please change this music, Mommy. I can only like to listen to sad, slow songs right now.”
As I reach for a piece of bread out of the bag:
“No, Mama! Only KIDS can feed the ducks. Grown ups just WATCH.” (Complete with eye roll).
In response to the question, “What did you do at school today?”:
“At recess, me and A. and S. played ‘Bad Girls Club’.”
To which I responded, a little incredulously, “Whose idea was THAT?”
“Mine. Cause Daddy watched Bad Girls Club last night, and I watched it with him.”
And finally:
“My tummy hurts right here (pointing). I think there’s a baby in there. Probably a boy baby so Daddy can have a new friend.”
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Big Sister – Little Sister
Since Blythe was born, Alison has periodically asked how long it will be until Blythe can play with her. At first, I told her Blythe would be able to sit up by herself “around Christmas” and would be more fun. That came, and she asked how long it would be until she could REALLY play with her. I told her “around spring time” Blythe would be able to crawl and would be more fun, and then by summer she would be walking and could REALLY play!
Alison has waited ever so (im)patiently. Blythe has been crawling for a few weeks now, and follows Alison everywhere. It’s obvious that she adores her big sister. Gone are the days that Alison can just give Blythe a random toy and move a few feet away to play without interference. Also gone are the days when Alison can play with toys with small or edible parts unless Blythe is sleeping. Today, Alison said she didn’t want to live with a baby anymore. “What do you mean?” I asked. Alison replied, “It’s Ok with me if we can send Blythe back now. I mean, until she can know which toys are MINE.”